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Five Years of Truth: 2013/2014 He Knows Our Hearts

I committed my life to Jesus five and one half years ago. Each year He has given me new and wonderful things to learn, to feel, and to do.

Join me in reminiscing.

 

2013/2014 He Knows Our Hearts

Search me, God, and know my heart;    
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,    
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:23-24

fridayTime goes by and if we are true to God He continues to teach us. I still have so much to learn, but oh, what a joy it is. Nothing can compare to gaining knowledge through prayer and the reading of God’s Word.

In 2013 God began to teach me about relationships. I learned a lot about being a good and loving wife. I learned better ways to love my daughter and pray for her family. I learned about friendships. On these things I’m still learning.

He began to teach me about myself. We began a journey together that traveled inward. Only God knows our true hearts, and when He shows us what’s there, it can be surprising, even painful. For me, and probably for most of us, it is a crazy mixed up place. Some parts good. Some parts not so good. God doesn’t like dark places so all must and will come to light.

This year, 2014, I began to pray today’s verse of Scripture. My prayers have been sincere, but I didn’t quite realize what I was asking for.

You see I have a dark place in my heart. I was a victim of child abuse. I rose above it and moved forward in life. I told myself I would never confront it. Never look at it. Some things are better left in the darkness. I wonder … could I be wrong about that?

In August I started seeing a counselor. I promised myself I would never do that, but God had a different plan. For me He chose light over darkness, a choice I could not make on my own.

It’s a hard and scary road and it’s just begun. I don’t know how long this road is or where it will lead, but I do know with certainty, God, my Father, is with me. He is holding my hand. And when the road ends, He assures me, there will be a beautiful light in my heart where the dark place used to be.

Oh how I love that about God!!

j